The Continuing Adventures of Crazy Mom-- Episode 3, the Field Trip

Today Crazy Mom was feeling especially adventurous. She even let those kids destroy an old dolly bed with a hammer. Can you say demolition? Can you say repurpose? Can you say tiny bits of wood all over the place that had to all be picked up and swept up by the four happy hoodlums. In an especially generous moment, she also let them get out the legos. Yup, the tiny ones that usually hide in the back of the closet (Crazy Mom’s own closet). Yes, Crazy Mom was feeling especially jazzy.

Spontaneously, she declared it a field trip day. She stalwartly refused to leave the house until all those itty-bitty-teeny-tiny-owie-to-step-on-little legos had been picked up. She also used her drill sergeant voice to encourage shoe putting-on and coat zipping-up. The six year old twins grinned, the daughter placated, and the nine year old boy actually rolled his eyes. Hup, 2, 3, 4, Hup…

Crazy Mom was in a mood. She was rejoicing in the day that the Lord had made. The sun was shining. She had been up early. She had her coffee and her BBB (Bible Before Breakfast). She was ready! And, now, let the field trip begin.

They arrived at the Frederick Meijer Gardens to view the butterflies in the tropical conservatory. But first, they had to park in East Kabudaville (That’s Crazy Mom talk for “wow, we had to park far away” and “whoa, what a hike to that, what do you call it? Oh yeah, the entrance.”)

So it was a little busy. There were masses of children here to see the butterflies. Unfortunately, most of the visitors were of smallish size similar to that of the four happy hoodlums. Crazy Mom instructed the troops to stay close but Lucas’s eyes were already sparkling. He had spotted his first “new family” of the day. He was already making friends with the four year old blonde while mom hung up all five coats. The nine year old looked impatient…think..think…aha! Crazy mom handed him the camera. Sure enough, his eyes lit up as he wandered away. Crazy Mom silently praised that God of hers for such a great idea.

She made her way out of the coat room back into the large entrance hall. The daughter stuck like glue, but not those boys..Was that Marc? “Marc,” hollered Crazy Mom, “get back here and get your coat off.” No, wait, it was just a boy weating a coat just like Marc’s. That’s not fair, she thought, Marc already has a twin. Aha! There was Marc. She marched over to take his hand and turned to see a boy who was far too old to be lying on the floor actually lying on the floor. He was looking at the sculpture suspended from the ceiling. His camera looked very familiar. Oh dear, Crazy Mom prayed for patience as she snapped her fingers. “Just a minute, Mom…there! Now that’s a picture, look!” Poor boy, he got the “Yes, dear, that’s very nice…please don’t lie on the floor…now where are your brothers?” speech.

Crazy Mom deep sighed, “Alright, Lord,” she prayed silently, “I’m responsible for Your kids on this field trip. Thank-you for allowing me to be the one they call Mom.” Crazy Mom felt the peace that passes understanding wrap itself a little tighter around her heart and she actually smiled and truly admired the boy’s photo—it was a unique shot. Her aspiring photographer beamed at the genuine praise and surprisingly, even offered to let his sister take a picture.

While this moment of sharing happened, Crazy Mom realized Marc was still nowhere to be seen and Lucas was….she scanned the area… Of course, he was chatting up the blonde and her family. But they were ready to move on. The mom pointed out Crazy Mom to Lucas but he pretended not to see. Crazy Mom had to actually walk over to collect him.

Then she heard a small slam. The sound was familiar..she tried to connect it to something…anything….piano? aha! A piano. A piano lid over keys, that’s it..that’s MARC! Plink plink. “Honey, don’t touch this piano, it’s not yours.” “But mom, we don’t have a piano.”

Okay, collect Marc. Return to see three children lying on the floor under the suspended sculpture taking more pictures.

As Crazy Mom reminds herself to lean not on her own understanding but to trust in the Lord with all her heart, she realizes she can still see the coat room, and they have not seen a single butterfly. As she lies on the floor and studies the sculpture, yes, it is a unique perspective, she realizes it may be awhile before another spontaneous field trip.

Join us next time when Crazy Mom discovers teaching the art of sharing is far more difficult than she realized.

Gentle leading

Crazy Mom has been at it again. This time, she again got right down on her knees and pleaded with God to forgive her mistakes and let His grace fill in all the gaps where she has messed up with the kids. She asked for wisdom, patience and gentle leading. The Lord brought to mind one of her favorite verses from Isaiah, “He gently leads those that have young.”

Boy, did she need that gentle leading. On Tuesday, there were pencil marks on the boys’ wall, but no pencil. She vaguely wondered how long the marks had actually been there and if a pencil would fit in the floor vent. On Wednesday, they had dumped out all their toy baskets and built a “barricade!” so “no one can enter!” No wonder they were playing so good and quietly in their room. ”We did it shushly mom! Isn’t that great?”

“It’s great that you know the word, ‘barricade’”, managed Crazy Mom as she chalked up another chapter in her endeavor to always find the positive. On Thursday, the little girl cried during Science and the boy flatly refused to do his daily gram and sat on his bed for a LONG time.

But Friday was library day and all went well, all had fun, all got books, and crazy mom was once more counting her blessings. “Are my twins really five already?” She wonders one moment, while “Thank goodness they are finally five,” is her very next thought. As the days start to blur into weeks and months and years Crazy Mom will continue to rely on her faith, and she is grateful for coffee, chocolate frosting (yes, out of the container with a spoon), and that gentle leading.

The Adventures of Crazy Mom (Fellow Crazy Moms pictured here also).

When we last left our heroine, she was babbling incoherently into a thrice-heated cup of coffee while locked in the bathroom. Small children knocked, then pounded, making some sort of vague demand about tying balloons, but Crazy mom was oblivious to all.

But that was last time. Today, Crazy Mom is up to all new incredible stunts. Thankfully, Crazy Mom loves, adores, worships, and serves Jesus. Contrary to some beliefs, this does not make for an easy perfect live but can actually make life more challenging! Thankfully, there are benes. (you know, benefits), like her stalwart belief in John 3:16 and that Philippians 4:13 credo. She only exists as Crazy Mom through this faith in Christ.

Today, Crazy Mom was able to resist yelling at the children (except when they tore the living room curtain down after being told to “calm down” at least twice. Crazy Mom realized anew how much she needs God’s grace and forgiveness. She apologized for yelling. They apologized for their sin. All ended well.)

Crazy Mom was also able to convince two four year olds that “yes, indeedy, they did know how to clean up and that insisting to the contrary was not only unproductive, uncooperative, unkind, but also untrue and wrong.” Crazy Mom did tend to go on a little long as the lecture finally ended along the lines of “obey right away, all the way, and with a good heart.” Crazy Mom did that deep sigh thing she does, breathing in with the whisper“less of me” and breathing out “more of Jesus.”

Crazy Mom found herself in need of God’s grace as the day continued. She punished one twin for the other twin’s error and didn’t follow up in the “no more TV today.” promise because she needed a shower and TV keeps the troops stationary. She flatly refused to read a book because she was “making dinner” and yelled at the older two for goofing off while they were supposedly doing the dishes, “we are only making it fun, Mom!” Deep sigh thing again.
As the day ended and Crazy Mom felt the despair of her mistakes creeping in on her, she again turned to that Bible she loves and believed that God’s grace is sufficient and God will provide a way.

She tucked the precious hoodlums in, read them stories, kissed and hugged them, and prayed with them, genuinely thanking God for the responsibility and awesome privilege of being called Mom.

Maybe “Mom” to some, but to others who know her well, she is known as “Crazy Mom”. Tune in next time as Crazy Mom attempts library day, and the birthday party for two.